“Please don’t leave me.” Macey cried to Rowan hoping she could forgive her for what she did. Macey admitted she cheated on her less than an hour ago, she knew she wouldn’t be able to keep the secret from her. Rowan held the key to her heart and with that came the ability to tell when she was lying.

 

They stand in the hallway of their apartment in silence the space charged with anger and regret. Macey spoke and Rowan can’t help but roll her eyes not believing anything that came out of her mouth. Macey regretted it but that doesn’t change the fact she did it. They stare at each other tears in both of their eyes, both broken hearted over the transgression that’s occurred.

 

“What do you want from me Macey? How am I supposed to trust you? I don’t see how I can forgive you for this. What made you go out and cheat? We’ve had so many fights before this so why now?” Rowan asked her eyes never left Macey, if looks could kill Macey would be dead on the floor right now. Rowan needed to get out of here, she couldn’t stand to be in the same place as Macey. She put on a brave face because Macey didn’t deserve to see her tears. But the worst part is the person she would go to in order to help her get over this would be Macey, how fucked up is that? She had no one to go to, how is she supposed to do this? How is she supposed to leave her? She has no clue what to do.

 

“I don’t know how you are supposed to trust me but I will do anything I can to prove to you that I love you and won’t do anything like this again. I just…we had yet another fight and it felt like this was the big one. The one that would end it all and I just went out in self-destruct mode and did it. You have to believe me it meant nothing.” Macey begged but she knew by the look on Rowan’s face there isn’t getting past this, she was done.

 

Macey closed her eyes and took a deep breath; after seven years this is how it ended. With one mistake, a mistake Macey regretted with every fiber of her being. She didn’t know what else to say. It felt like someone took a jack hammer to her heart and is shattering it into many pieces that she will never be able to put back together again.

 

When she opened her eyes the tears finally spilled out of her eyes like a waterfall, they fell without her permission. Both women met each other’s eyes and neither of them looked away because they knew this is the last time they will see each other.

 

“Please. Don’t leave.” Macey begged in a whisper; she couldn’t do life without her.

 

Rowan moved toward the door and grabbed her jacket she put it on slowly almost as if she didn’t want to leave.

 

A tiny sliver of hope opened in her heart hoping they could work through this and everything would be okay. But the moment she looked in her eyes again she knew, she’s not staying.

 

“I wish there was more to say, I wish I could give you what you want. But you broke my trust and you broke my heart. You slept with a man, someone I can’t compare to and I know it shouldn’t bother me but it does. I love you and some part of me always will but this isn’t something I am going to be able to move past.” Her hand went to the door handle and she took a deep breath. Rowan opened the door and walked out never intending to return again.

 

--------

 

8 weeks later Macey sat in her bathroom as she looked down at a piece of plastic that had the power to change the rest of her life. She looked at her phone and saw the timers was at the three minute and thirty-eight seconds mark. Those minutes are the longest five minutes of her life. She didn’t know what she was going to do if that test came back positive, she’s alone. Rowan’s gone no matter how much she grovels, no matter how many times she had shown up on Rowan’s sisters doorstep on her knees as she begged to take her back. There was no coming back from this. She feels as if she was drowning in the ocean, like she went too far out from the shore and the tide is too strong for her to swim back. This was all too much.

 

She didn’t have any family to support her, she is estranged from her parents and her sister isn’t someone she could go to for help or advice. All the friends she used to have were friends she had with Rowan and they all took Rowan’s side in the breakup. She didn’t know what she was going to do and then the timer went off.

 

Macey takes a deep breath and turned the test over.

 

There’s a knock on the door, she threw the test in the trash on her way out of the bathroom wanting to be done with it relieved to not have to look at it even though it doesn’t change the result. She answers the door and it’s the last person she ever thought would be here.

 

“Rowan…what are you doing here?” Deep down she hoped she wasn’t here to pick up all her stuff because that meant everything really was over between them.

 

“I made a mistake. I think I can forgive you; it was just a – a shock is all but I can get past it, you are obviously sorry about what happened and I can’t imagine my life without you in it and I know you will never do anything like it again. And there’s nothing to compare myself to so it’s almost like it doesn’t matter.” Rowan said and Macey stood there not knowing how to react or what to say, obviously she wanted to accept her back into her life but there was something she needed to get off her chest.

 

“I’m pregnant.” Macey says her hands forming fists as she wished this wasn’t their situation right now. She knew there was no coming back from this.

 

Rowan looked at her not moving, not knowing what to do; she came here to tell Macey she wants to give them another shot and now this? A baby? A constant reminder of that night?

 

Rowan closed her eyes and wished things were different, she opened her eyes and looked into Macey’s tear-filled eyes and she knew this wasn’t how she wanted it to go either. Rowan took a deep breath and shook her head knowing she couldn’t handle this much on her plate right now. Dealing with the cheating and trying to get past it is one thing but a baby from a one-night stand that broke them? That was too much for Rowan to handle.

 

Rowan looked away from Macey tears in her eyes and turned around knowing it’s too much for her to handle at once. She walked away and Macey watched her walk down the hall and to the stairs, she wished things were different, wished she could go back in time.